Pandemic’s Emotional Toll on Moms Lingers – Can Self-Compassion Help?
Study findings underscore the need for supportive spaces, education and counseling to help mothers prioritize emotional well-being without guilt.
The COVID-19 pandemic was an unprecedented challenge worldwide, but for many mothers, it brought an even heavier burden. Mothers took on increased responsibilities at home – from childcare to remote learning – while also navigating disruptions in work and personal life. These added demands contributed to rising stress levels, mental health concerns and a loss of identity for many.
Social isolation intensified these challenges, especially for those already facing difficulties before the pandemic, highlighting the need to prioritize maternal mental health in recovery efforts.
Through the lens of “self-compassion,” õ researchers used photovoice, a community-based participatory research method involving photography and reflection, to explore how mothers of children ages 5 to 12 understood and practiced this concept for well-being in the aftermath of the pandemic.
Self-compassion is the practice of treating oneself with kindness and understanding during difficult times and helps people face challenges without self-criticism. It recognizes struggles as part of the shared human experience and encourages responding with care instead of judgment, fostering emotional resilience and better mental health.
Results of the study, published in the journal , uncovered four key themes: mothers’ struggles with self-compassion; feelings of isolation and desire for connection; heightened awareness for self-compassion and need for more education; and the critical role of mindfulness in daily life.
Findings showed that some mothers found it difficult to practice self-compassion because of the intense demands of motherhood and societal expectations, frequently prioritizing their families over their own well-being. They often equated self-compassion with self-care, missing the deeper, more nurturing kindness that true self-compassion entails. Key challenges included giving themselves permission to engage in self-compassion, carving out time amid relentless responsibilities, and overcoming feelings of low self-worth.
Feelings of isolation often clashed with a deep desire for connection, with social media playing a complex role in shaping mothers’ sense of belonging and self-worth. While it sometimes offered validation and support, it also triggered harmful comparisons and heightened self-criticism, deepening loneliness and disconnection.
“Social media is complicated – while it can offer support, it also creates an illusion of perfection that many mothers compare themselves to,” said Kelly Emelianchik-Key, Ph.D., senior author and an associate professor in the Department of Clinical Mental Health Counseling within FAU’s College of Education. “Mothers crave authentic relationships where they can share struggles without judgment.”
As mothers grew more aware of self-compassion’s importance, they called for increased education, support and accessible resources. They expressed a strong need for acknowledgment – both from others and themselves – and highlighted the value of psychoeducation to better understand self-compassion and the pressures they face. Some also discussed the unrealistic expectations of “intensive mothering,” a social ideal demanding constant self-sacrifice often at the expense of their well-being.
“Research shows self-compassion reduces anxiety, depression, stress and parenting challenges, and improves mental health and resilience,” said Carman Gill, Ph.D., co-author and a professor in the FAU Department of Clinical Mental Health Counseling. “It also benefits children, as self-compassionate mothers are better equipped to handle emotional stress and support their children’s emotional well-being.”
Mindfulness practices were commonly used by participants as part of their self-compassion routines. These included a broad, open awareness of their surroundings, focused attention on specific moments, and tactile experiences such as enjoying coffee or spending time in nature. These mindfulness activities helped mothers ground themselves and cultivate self-kindness in their everyday lives.
“Although mindfulness practices emerged as valuable tools for mothers to engage with their emotions and surroundings, cultivating true self-compassion requires intentional effort beyond mindfulness alone,” said Emelianchik-Key.
The lasting impact of pandemic-related stress and increased caregiving demands may now seem normalized, but they continue to influence how maternal stress and role strain are addressed in counseling. This study highlights the need for counselors to adopt a thoughtful, comprehensive approach to support mothers in cultivating self-compassion and promoting overall well-being.
“Integrating evidence-based practices such as Mindful Self-Compassion can help build emotional resilience and reduce symptoms of anxiety, depression and burnout – particularly for mothers with limited access to mental health care,” said Gill.
Because Mindful Self-Compassion is not a form of therapy, the researchers note that it’s essential for counselors to assess each mother’s emotional readiness, as engaging in self-compassion work can sometimes surface unresolved or painful emotions, a response known as “backdraft.”
“Mothers with complex trauma or mental health challenges may require additional therapeutic support alongside self-compassion practices,” said Emelianchik-Key.
Study co-authors are Adriana C. Labarta, Ph.D.; and Clara Bossie, Ph.D., both Ph.D. graduates from the FAU College of Education.
-FAU-
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